Relationships Advice
Understanding Interpersonal Relationships
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Relationship - Men vs WomenThere is a definite and distinct difference in a relationship, even a good relationship, between how a man views it and how a woman views it. Perhaps not so much in the "view" of the relationship but how that relationship is nurtured and grown. The first aspect where men and women are different can be seen in the relational interactions between friends. When a woman goes out for lunch with three friends, she will go out with Susie, Mary, and Pam. But when a guy meets three of his buddies for lunch, he is meeting with Dorkwad, Dweeb, and Nerdo. It is a "guy thing" to do that and it is acceptable both socially and is also acceptable with his buddies, since they might refer to him as Fatso, and no offense is taken. Men are concise and like brevity, for the most part. State the fact and move on. Men typically do not get into the nitty gritty detail, examining their feelings, looking for nuances, reading between the lines. Women however are noted for doing all of the above -- examining the details, analyzing their feelings, searching for nuances between the lines. Is one bad and the other good? Not at all, that is just the way it is, and the sooner you realize that, understand that, and accept that, the better you will both be at growing your relationship, It is for this reason that a man has a much harder time saying "I love you" than a woman does. That does not mean, not at all, that the man does not love the woman every bit as much, if not more so, than she loves him, it is simply that he fails to see the need to repeat a known fact. Therein lies the problem, even as much as a man will accept this "shortcoming" in a woman, and a woman will similarly accept that "shortcoming" in a man. Guys, she wants to hear you say that, because if you don't, there is a woman thing that will kick in and hyperventilate her imagination, leading her to believe that since you haven't said you love her, maybe you don't. Gals, since you just told him that you love him 20 seconds ago, and again 42 seconds before that, do you really feel the need to re-affirm that fact one more time right now? The fact is that many people -- mostly but not exclusively women -- have an insecure side. They need to be reassured. Much of this insecurity comes from their own feelings of low self esteem. And as we have discussed in other articles here, it all comes down once again to communication. When you are communicating with your spouse, does most of your conversation serve to build them up or tear them down? Do you concentrate on what they did wrong today or on what they did right? Unfortunately, many people tend to focus on the negative, which in turn will tend to lower than person's self esteem. And the reaction to that is a natural one -- to come back with negatives for you, so that eventually you both have self esteem levels that are lower than a snake's belly in a wagon rut. Being aware of these aspects and expected reactions will help you further understand your spouse, and that understanding will help to turn your communications into relationship building sessions so that your relationship can grow and strengthen. Humanity Love Relationships Resources Key To Building Customer Relationships Teen Relationships Abusive Relationships Relationships And Control Issues Relationship Breakdowns Relationship Myths
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